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Aspiring Hotwife
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By: Spidey81, 2012-12-08 19:31:58
What do you guys think is the difference between cuckoldress vs hotwife and what do most ladies here see themselves as?
By: jinxypie, 2013-01-02 01:18:09
I'm a Cuckoldress.

Personally, I think the difference is in how you interact with your man. If he's being humiliated or degraded or belittled in any way, it's cuckolding. If he's enjoying in the "show" or even joining in on the sex, it's a hotwife relationship.

By: LatinaQT, 2013-01-11 05:06:59
Ohhhh.... so then I started out a hotwife and ended up more of a cuckoldress. haha, cool.
By: Redkatherine, 2013-01-18 17:05:04
LOL! That would be me as well @LatinaQT.
By: MultifacetedMoi, 2013-01-19 02:24:56
Hey, Spidey!

I have to agree with Jinxypie. As a Cuckoldress, I find there is a huge difference between the way I interact with K and the way I see some hotwives interact with their mates. For me, one of the components of my relationship is a consensual power exchange (CPE), which means that K is more submissive to me and is more likely to do things for me that he wouldn't normally do in his daily life, if he were single. However, in my experience, even the level of power exchange varies, which means the level of humiliation, degradation, orgasm control/denial, and anything else the couple chooses to incorporate into their cuckold relationship will vary accordingly.

I, for one, am not an extremist. I have my cozy comfort zone of kinks I like to play with in my relationship, but I'm not into a total power exchange (TPE), which, from what I've seen, can incorporate things I feel are more extreme, such as castration (medical, chemical, or fantasy), attrition (complete sexual denial for the cuckold), slavery, toilet games, and so on. While I don't feel it's wrong for a couple to pursue their fantasies together, whatever they may be, I think it just goes to show that even beyond the words hotwife and cuckoldress, there are worlds of differences in the relationships that fall under each of those terms. So, when you ask what the difference is between a cuckoldress and a hotwife, depending on who you ask, the answer could be very little or it could be a great deal.

Also, from what I've seen, there are variations in hotwife relationships. Some women enjoy the breeding aspect, some the interracial pursuits, and others prefer something more akin to swinging or an open relationship. I think, if you're trying to sort out which type of woman you feel you would be best suited with in a relationship, or what type of relationship you want with a couple, it would be in your best interests to get to know a variety of people and ask them to discuss their relationships, both the mechanics and the more intimate details, with you. I have yet to meet a cuckolding couple, no matter how they identify specifically, who isn't willing to share the joy they experience and the knowledge they've gained with someone who shows genuine interest.

In fact, I'd be willing to bet that, although Jinxypie and I identify as Cuckoldresses, we have very different types of relationship with our men. I've known about Jinxy for a while and I know she enjoys multiple lovers. She is a great Cuckoldress and her website is full of interesting tidbits, as is her series Cuckolding 101. However, you'll find, should you begin poking around in my neck of the woods, I have a different view of what I want for my relationship. My ideal of keeping things simple is having a closed triad with a cuckold and a Bull, both of whom remain faithful to me.

This was a great, thought-provoking question, by the way!
By: Spidey81, 2013-02-05 20:46:16
Thank you ladies for all thoughts. Very interesting and very informative. The last post made me think though how far should or can you go what do u cuckoldress ladies think about castration or even attrition
By: wifesahottie, 2013-02-17 23:56:52
I must go along with Jinxypie on that one, but what do you call the husband of a hotwife? as he technically isn't a cuckold. My wife is a Hotwife.
By: jandn4sex, 2013-05-22 13:23:00
wow, very interesting topic and very informative.
By: MultifacetedMoi, 2013-07-16 01:02:59
You're welcome, Spidey. Personally, I don't find castration or attrition appealing. I like variety, or I wouldn't seek this type of relationship, and that includes being able to have my mate when and how I see fit.

@Wifesahottie, you may find the term wittol more to your liking.
By: Worshypper, 2014-11-10 07:38:57
oh I was born to serve my HotWife. She has to be happy. That's what matter for me. Until I leave her support.
By: noreen, 2015-01-08 11:11:11
i'm not sure what the difference is but i've kind of adopted the label of hotwife without giving it too much thought! i'm probably a bit of both - i like to tease hubby about my preference for and submissiveness to well hung guys but at the same time, hubby gets all the sex he wants from me and i love it.
By: leilaclairemont, 2015-02-21 02:35:25
I'm definitely a hotwife! :) I'm very submissive so the role as cuckoldress wouldn't suit me too well. Teasing is of course part of our game but no humiliation. For me it's the biggest turn on to share the horny situation as equal partners. However I can see how being a cuckoldress could be quite spicy too and I'd never say never as I'm pretty new to the whole lifestyle. :)
By: HotAssHotWife, 2017-06-21 02:21:17
Started as a hotwife. It was about variety and fun experiences. Over time, it evolved to where I am a cuckoldress. My husband thought he wanted it, to see me with other men. But reality doesn't follow the fantasy script. Careful what you wish for was never truer. Now I often have incredibly great sex and even genuinely romantic love with great men and Hubby gets nothing. Doesn't even watch me. Most if the men are gentlemen and respectful around him, but it is always clear who has my sexual attention and the complete expression of my love.
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